Matthew 14:13–21
Genesis 32:22–31
August 6, 2023
Rev. Fa Lane
““After the Wrestling, a Blessing”
“I will not let you go, unless you bless me.”
Jacob has an enviable relationship with God who seems so unknowable to most of us. He is visited in dreams and given insights and instructions from the great mysterious realm beyond us. One of my favorite writers is a poet, and counselor, who explores this Sacred Mystery we named God. She tells stories of personal journeys and yet her writings lay bare universal truths and longings common to us all. The story of Jacob displays a longing many of us pursue… our own identity. Remember Jacob was a twin.
He was looking for his own sense of place in his community. He and his mother sought to establish him as Isaac’s heir of the Abrahamic lineage. At her insistence, he moved to another region in search of a wife and a good life that suited him.
Aren’t we all looking for that sense of belonging, to have a person to share our life with - a spouse or a good companion, and a community where we feel safe and respected and allowed to be who we are? It’s part of the growing up process. You leave home and establish your own life, your own sense of home.
Jacob’s coming of age story shows that he didn’t know who he was; or more to the point, he didn’t know whom God had made him to be. In his pursuit of standing, of wealth, and honor among his peers, Jacob ran into relationship troubles. He tried to control things and have things the way he wanted them, when he wanted them. He did not know yet that God would bless him with his heart’s desire. It’s as though Jacob was mindlessly going about life, work-work-work, taking care of family, satisfying his boss. It all feels familiar to us. The striving. Where is God in that? Maybe God is right there waiting for us to notice.
In this Genesis story, Jacob tries to make his own way on his own terms for living and serving his Uncle Laban. When he was younger, in his father’s home, he wanted his father’s blessing and took things into his own hands with the help of his mother. They orchestrated a deceitful transfer of power from Isaac to Jacob not to Esau.
In the Matthew passage, the disciples want to manage things too and wanted the crowds to go get food on their own. They didn’t want to be responsible for feeding so many people. But they didn’t know the miraculous thing Jesus was about to do. The disciples were seeing things through human eyes like we do. Taking care of other people may not our first impulse, but it is an act of Christian love required of us if we’re to follow Jesus.
In the Old Testament story, Jacob has tricked his slightly older twin brother out of his rightful birthright inheritance and has run away from Esau’s resulting anger. After 20 years of service, Jacob comes back full circle now to return home. He returns with wives and herds and servants to display his wealth, his stature, his success. But he is nervous about facing his brother. He is leaving his old life behind. He doesn’t know what’s coming.
We run into similar identity crisis for every day we don’t know what God has in mind for us and what we’ll think of it. What will it ask of us when we see need or injustice. We live and make decisions sometimes without good information or without clarity of mind or assurances of success. As Oriah Mountain Dreamer writes in her poem, The Call. “ [we] are walking asleep. She writes: “Remember what you are and let this knowing take you home to the Beloved with every breath.” In other words, seek the peace of mind and assurance that comes from God.
The challenge is to remember we are each God’s child, one of Jesus’ siblings, heir to a throne, a people called away from sin and darkness and into eternal light, where our eternal home is. We are to be like Jesus, one with God.
Some days that transformation seems so far way, nigh to impossible with all the bad things that are happening in our world. There are lots of troubles in the world. But a Black Gospel song inspires us, “Soon Ah will be done with the troubles of the world. I want to be like Jesus.”
The disciples said the people were hungry. Feed them, Jesus said.
The poor are sick and struggling. Provide healthcare, Jesus says.
The immigrants are homeless. Find them housing, Jesus says.
There are people languishing in prison. Release them, Jesus says.
There’s too much violence and anger. Bring peace, Jesus says.
See to it that you do what is right. Do what Jesus would do.
Jacob did what was right in God’s sight. But he still had to do some work to come home to his spiritual home with God. In our confessional prayer, the spiritual work of coming home is acknowledging our sin and asking the Lord to forgive us, to remove what separates us from God. Lord, have mercy, we say. Christ have mercy. And, in our humility we can hear that softly and tenderly Jesus is calling – Come home. Come home.
Jacob’s life story of wrestling with humans and with God, is our story too. We have skirmishes over territory (Ukraine and Russia), wrangling for states’ rights and parental rights, arguments over social justice issues. We’ve reneged on treaties and turned a blind eye from acts of oppression.
We wrestle with humans and with God. But all of these, for Christians, have a foundational question, popularized on bracelets – What Would Jesus Do?
Jacob heard God call him home. Jacob who wore his brother’s clothes and tricked his poor-sighted father into believing he was Esau. Jacob who had to flee from Esau’s anger after losing that inheritance. Jacob who worked for Laban, not as his own boss, but as a servant for an uncle who changed the rules on him several times to keep Jacob from succeeding. Oh, how he wrestled with humans.
Then God told him to come home. Stop striving after the world and come home. Where was God during Jacob’s striving? Waiting for him; and I believe God is waiting for us also.
Jacob wanted to live in peace, in his own body, with the ones he loved, with his extended family, among his own people. But, because of his earlier plotting and manipulative behavior when he was younger, he was not at peace. He sent hundreds and hundreds of goats and rams and camels and cows and donkeys to his brother as a peace offering. Jacob thinks that will do it, but, it’s not until he wrestles and reconciles with God that he gets the blessing he has longed for, his own identity with a new name. Israel.
We often long for home and family and safety. We long to be called a child of God and to feel that sense of being home in our own being. Confessing our sins and asking for forgiveness reconciles us with the Beloved so we can be our true selves and one with God.
Confession doesn’t add to the weight of guilt but rather, confession relieves it. Confession to God leads to peace with God and leaves us with the assurance that we are forgiven, cleansed, and free! That’s a blessing.
I leave you with the beginning of Oriah Mountain Dreamer’s poem, “The Call”.
The Call
“I have heard it all my life, A voice calling a name I recognized as my own. Sometimes it comes as a soft-bellied whisper.
Sometimes it holds an edge of urgency. But always it says: Wake up my love. You are walking asleep. There's no safety in that! Remember what you are and let this knowing take you home to the Beloved with every breath.”
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